Eyes Wide Open

It's amazing what you learn about people when you are going through hard times. I have needed my friends to lean on the last couple of days, and the people that I have been friends with the longest have failed me. These are people that I have gone out of my way to visit in the hospital or at home soon after giving birth, an illness, etc., and not a single one of them has offered to come visit me, help me out, nothing. And you know what? The same exact thing happened last year when I had surgery. Guess it's time to re-evaluate my relationships. Fed-Ex came by yesterday to drop some tires off for my neighbor, but when I saw the delivery guy, I initially thought maybe someone had sent me flowers or something. How foolish did I feel when he said, "Can I leave these tires here for Mr. Sledge?" I am sick of being disappointed. I don't need anyone to DO anything for me, except maybe stop by to visit for a little while, maybe watch a movie or something. It makes me sad, in a way, that the people who have offered to do anything they could are people I have known for less than a year. Knowing that I could call 10 or so of them, and knowing that they would be here as soon as possible makes me realize even more that the people I SHOULD be able to depend on just aren't there for me.
So, to those of you who have kept me in your prayers, who have offered to do help me out in any way possible, know that I am more grateful and appreciative than you will ever know, and that if I can ever return the favor, I will do so in a heartbeat.
Sorry if this is a little rambly. It's 5:00 am and the latest dose of vicodin is finally kicking in.